Did you know that Kristen Stewart (plays Bella in the Twilight series) actually tried out for the Three Little Pigs. Yes, the 'most hated woman in Hollywood' as reported by the Sun (true story) felt that she could do the part of the third pig justice; however, the casting crew decided to go with someone else... they felt Kristen just didn't quite fit the character. See below for details:
Once upon a time, there was an old sow with three little pigs. As she had not enough to keep them, she sent them out to seek their fortune.
The first pig met a man with a bundle of straw and said to him, "Please, Man, may I have some straw to build a house?" The man gave him some straw and the first pig built a house of straw.
One day, the Big, Bad Wolf came by, knocked on the first pig's door and said, "Little pig, little pig, let me come in."
"Not by the hair on my chiny chin chin," replied the first pig.
The wolf answered, "Well, then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in." So the wolf huffed and he puffed and he blew his house in and he ate up the first little pig.
The second pig met a man with a bundle of sticks and said to him, "Please, Man, may I have some sticks to build a house?" The man gave him some sticks and the second pig built a house of sticks.
One day, the Big, Bad Wolf came by, knocked on the second pig's door and said, "Little pig, little pig, let me come in."
"Not by the hair on my chiny chin chin," replied the second pig.
The wolf answered, "Well, then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in." So the wolf huffed and he puffed and he huffed and he puffed and he blew his house in and he ate up the second little pig.
The third little pig (played by Kristen Stewart) met a man with a load of bricks. "You know, I punched a werewolf in the face before," she said to the man with a stoic look on her face. When he looked at her scared, she continued, "Just give me the damn bricks." The man handed over the bricks and the third little pig was on her way. She built her house out of the bricks.
One day, the Big, Bad Wolf came, as he had with the other pigs, and said, "Little pig, little pig, let me come in."
The third little pig went to the door and looked through the peephole. "So you're a werewolf?" she asked, fist poised.
"No, not a werewolf, just a normal wolf. Now let me in!"
"You're not the first monster I've met, you know," her stoic face replied.
The wolf, frustrated by how long this was taking decided to just blow her house down. So he huffed and he puffed and he huffed and he puffed and he huffed and he puffed... but he couldn't blow her house down. It was just too strong.
Angry and starving, the wolf knocked on the front door even harder. "Little pig, little pig, let me come in! Either you unlock this door, or I'll climb down the chimney!"
"Please don't make me choose!" the third little pig responded, her voice slightly elevated, but her face remaining stoic.
The wolf was now enraged. How could one little pig cause so much difficulty?! He climbed to the top of the house and hopped in to the chimney. He slid down and landed in a hot bowl of soup the third pig had been cooking.
"Ouch!!!!" he yelled in pain.
The third little pig looked at the wolf very intently, watching him squirm from the heat of the fire as his fur was scorched and the smell of burnt hair filled the brick house. "Did you know, you're sort of beautiful?" she gave a hint of a smile to the wolf.
The third little pig couldn't believe it. Was she really falling in love with a wolf, something that could kill her in one bite?!
"Um, hello, I'm dying here. I'm being burnt alive. You know you'll never get into pig heaven if you kill me!"
"If this is about my soul, take it! I don't want it without you!" the pig exclaimed (face stoic as ever) as she hopped into the boiling cauldron, becoming hot and steamy with the wolf as they each cooked into eternity.
It's a tragedy really; She could have brought a lot to this story. But then again, she probably didn't get the part because she cheated on Rob. Is anyone ever going to want to watch her in anything ever again?! The Three Little Pigs directors sure don't think so. All I have to say about this is Rob doesn't deserve that. I would never do that to him.